Public Service Announcement

Once upon a time there was a man who had ‘just a common cold’.
(Once upon a time = Sunday 7 Nov)
He took some paracetamol and ‘cracked on’.
Late the next morning he took a Lateral Flow Test
and it was weak positive
An hour later he took another and it was positive
An hour later and he was at a walk-in test centre
And then Covid kicked the absolute living shit out of him.


If he hadn’t been an ex-squaddie (whereby asking for help was seen as a sign of weakness) he would have rang 999 in the early hours of Tuesday morning
Instead he ‘cracked on’ until 11am and only rang 111 when he was fighting for breath


The call-handler couldn’t tell from the patient whether he was having a cardiac event (he had shortness of breath and crushing chest pains ) or ‘just Covid’
So he told the man to take 300mg of aspirin, to stay calm, and he sent a paramedic and an ambulance


A friend of the man – a GP – knocked on his door to enquire about his wellbeing and was met by a man clutching his chest, barely able to stand, gasping for breath, crying his eyes out in stark fear, and unable to form sentences.


By the time the paramedic arrived the man was still in great distress but could breathe.
The paramedic diagnosed ‘just Covid’
The man could stand, breathe sort of, and his vital signs had sort of stabilised
The man wondered how bad he would have had to be to get through A&E and in to a bed on the Covid ward
The man’s phone beeped on Tuesday afternoon and his Covid test was +ve
Until Wednesday evening the man was very very fucking unwell, but not that unwell on the Great Covid Scale of Fucked Up™️


On Wednesday evening a friend did a little groceries shop for the man.
The man bit in to a bar of chocolate and tasted tin foil. That’s odd thought the man.
The man then peeled, smelt, and bit a banana. He smelt nothing and tasted tin foil. He couldn’t taste soup. He couldn’t smell (very heavily peated) whisky.
When he brushed his teeth before bed the minty toothpaste tasted of tinfoil.

As he writes this he’s exhausted. Coughs and deep breaths are very painful. But he’s not one of the 142,000 dead from the virus in the UK.

Evidence suggests that a lot of early adopters of the vaccines (he has had both, and was due his booster tomorrow), have an increased (completely false) sense of their Covid protection. An awful lot of ‘double vaxxers’ are now getting infected.

The man very seriously advises that if you have ‘just a common cold’, that you take a Covid test.

The man implores you to continue to wear a mask. Please.

Go safely ….

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: